Spa Night! This is Your Night!

Stress can be emotionally draining and can cause issues with your health.  If you are in a relationship and both working hard, especially married with children too much time goes by where you have hardly any time with your spouse or partner, At the end of the week you need time alone with your significant other? With the demands of career, maybe finishing up your degree, raising a family, after school activities, community activities, clubs, and organizations, then caring for your children, helping them with homework, projects, and playing games just to name a few it’s no wonder you don’t have time to share time alone with one another, even after they are in bed, there will be knocking at the bedroom door for something. This can zap the romance for many years to come.

This is not the peace, serenity and rejuvenating time that everyone needs, especially in marriage when you are sharing your life and trying to have more intimacy. The children, may have sports and you are taking them to practice helping with homework and then the TV is on, maybe sports on the weekend, bills, medical issues, appointments and it just piles up. We make hair appointments, nail appointments and then take time to shop for groceries, clothes, then cooking cleaning, laundry etc. The children’s needs set the agenda for how time is spent for the most part and when you do find time alone together you’re out of practice and even energy. You may be waiting on your spouse to make the first move to do something to initiate a romantic evening. The reality is you may need to talk about this and this does not mean that the romance is gone.

Romance may need to be scheduled  just like everything else you are juggling in your life. Scheduling is the new norm for your family and romance is important for your marriage to thrive. You can start by scheduling your own in home Spa Night. Scheduling time to be together like this may be necessary (Just pencil it in). Some may find it a bit ridiculous and even offensive putting romance on a schedule. Even though it may seem a bit of a formality and lacks the spontaneity, you are more likely to succeed by setting a schedule. Whether you choose to follow a schedule or not, what’s important is to try to spend time with your partner doing something that is enjoyable. Spa Night is just one example you can begin right in your own home.

Spa night is very rejuvenating and it is up to you how often you want to have this special night. You can alternate one day a week or month. Discuss it with each other. Each night one person gets the massage/pampering experience. The one who gives the massage is the giver and the one who receives is the receiver. The giving partner massages receiving partner from head to toe front and back. Take your time and give soothing, stress-relieving massage, where the receiver forgets everything except the good feeling sensations from you.

You can expand on these spa nights anyway you wish as the giver, add rose petals in the water (they are a natural skin softener, even putting a soft sheet in the tub before filling it with water is an exhilarating feeling as you lay in the bath The movement of the water and sheet against your body caresses the skin. It will make it easier to scrub her back, wash and condition her hair with her favorite shampoo and conditioner. Remember the ambiance. Add music and aromatherapy candles. You can buy him a super soft robe and slippers or buy her flowers.

If you have never done this, it may feel awkward but just go with it. You may laugh at first, but enjoy the moment just like anything new you have done together. Maybe you can have a little slow dance in the bedroom first. write a love letter earlier that week and read it while they are soaking in the tub. Write about special things you appreciate about each other that week.

Learning the technique of massage together is a wonderful way to learn about every muscle on each other’s body. Whether you take a class or watch a DVD, or just feel your way, massage is the most amazing gift to receive from someone you love. Massage will get you in tuned with each other, it will add intimacy, physical, mental and emotional healing,and if romance seemed to be on the back burner, massage will stir up those embers. Never underestimate the power of loving hands massaging with slow and precise deliberation.  Remember, each night of massage there is a giver and the one receiving the massage must relax and just surrender. This is your night.

Massage causes chemicals to be released from your muscles and also helps the lymph glands move toxins from your soft tissue. This helps rid your body of waste toxic substances by assisting your blood to move throughout your body. So make sure you drink plenty of water


~Shannon Jennifer Knight

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